Post 7

Muslim reports from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet said Imam:  
“By the One in Whose hand is my soul, there is no man who calls his wife to his bed, and she  refuses him, but the One Who is in heaven will be angry with her, until the husband is pleased with her once more.” 

  
The angels’ curse will befall every woman who is rebellious and disobedient; this does not  exclude those who are too slow and reluctant to respond to their husbands:  
“Allah (subhaanahu wa ‘ta’aalaa) will curse those procrastinating women who, when their husbands call them to their beds, say ‘I will, I will . . .’ until he falls asleep.” 

    
Marriage in Islam is intended to protect the chastity of men and women alike, therefore it is  the woman’s duty to respond to her husband’s requests for conjugal relations. She should not  give silly excuses and try to avoid it. For this reason, several hadeeth urge a wife to respond  to her husband’s needs as much as she is able, no matter how busy she may be or whatever  obstacles there may be, so long as there is no urgent or unavoidable reason not to do so. 

 
In one of these hadeeth, the Prophet  said:  
“If a man calls his wife to his bed, let her respond, even if she is riding her camel [i.e., very busy].”

And:  
“If a man calls his wife, then let her come, even if she is busy at the oven.”21 
The issue of protecting a man’s chastity and keeping him away from temptation is more  important than anything else that a woman can do, because Islam wants men and women  alike to live in an environment which is entirely pure and free from any motive of fitnah  or  haraam  pleasures. The flames of sexual desire and thoughts of pursuing them through  haraam  means can only be extinguished by means of discharging that natural energy in  natural and lawful ways. This is what the Prophet  meant in the hadeeth narrated by  Muslim from Jabir:  
“If anyone of you is attracted to a woman, let him go to his wife and have intercourse with her, for that will calm him down.”

The warning given to the woman whose husband is angry with her reaches such an extent  that it would shake the conscience of every righteous wife who has faith in Allah (subhaanahu  wa ‘ta’aalaa) and the Last Day: she is told that her prayer and good deeds will not be  accepted, until her husband is pleased with her again. This is stated in the hadeeth narrated  by Jabir from ‘Abdullah:  
“The Messenger of Allah  said: ‘There are three people whose prayers will not be  accepted, neither their good works: a disobedient slave until he returns to his masters and  puts his hand in theirs; a woman whose husband is angry with her, until he is pleased with her again; and the drunkard, until he becomes sober.’”  

 
When these hadeeth refer to the husband being angry with his wife, they refer to cases in  which the husband is right and the wife is wrong. When the opposite is the case, and the  husband is wrong, then his anger has no negative implications for her; in fact, Allah  (subhaanahu wa ‘ta’aalaa) will reward the wife for her patience. But the wife is still required to  obey her husband, so long as no sin is involved, because there should be no obedience to a  created being if it entails disobedience to the Creator. Concerning this, the Prophet  said:  
“It is not permitted for a woman who believes in Allah (subhaanahu wa ‘ta’aalaa) to allow  anyone into her husband’s house whom he dislikes; or to go out when he does not want her  to; or to obey anyone else against him; or to forsake his bed; or to hit him. If he is wrong, then  let her come to him until he is pleased with her, and if he accepts her then all is well, Allah  (subhaanahu wa ‘ta’aalaa) will accept her deeds and make her position stronger, and there will be no sin on her. If he does not accept her, then at least she will have done her best and excused herself in the sight of Allah (subhaanahu wa ‘ta’aalaa).”